Write a ‘not-to-do’ list
And take back control of your life
Happy Friday, Intentionalists!
Technology has enriched our lives enormously. Tasks that once took hours to complete can now be accomplished in minutes.
We can communicate with people all over the world at the touch of a button, watch our favourite TV series anytime we like, and even program our household appliances through our phones.
Yet, despite these exciting developments, we are more stressed than we’ve ever been and our expectations of ourselves and life have greatly increased.
Instead of getting exercise from housework, gardening, tennis or golf, as our parents and grandparents did, we cultivate ‘gym bodies’.
Age is no longer celebrated as a time of acquired wisdom but something to be ‘prevented’ with cosmetic and medical intervention.
Social media flashes images of perfect lives, while the 24-hour news cycle bombards us with round-the-clock horror.
Rather than being a solution to loneliness, constant connectivity has blurred the lines between our work and leisure time. People are dropping dead from ‘always being on’.
While governments are taking measures to counteract the downsides of technology, we must take back control of our own lives and put firm boundaries in place.
This means a ‘Not-To-Do’ list is as important to our well-being as a ‘To-Do’ list is to our productivity. That’s what we are working on today.
So, grab your pen and journal and let’s get started.
PROMPTS
Under each of the headings below write down activities that you feel are harming your well-being, productivity or happiness.
1. Work-life Productivity
Examples:
Looking at my emails first thing in the morning or just before I go to bed, and feeling I must answer them immediately.
2. Health Habits
Examples:
Eating takeaway food every night
Not getting enough sleep because I was doom-scrolling before bed or binge-watching a TV series …
3. Money Habits
Examples:
Paying for subscriptions I never use
Always buying lunch because I don’t have time to make my own …
4. Social/Relationship Habits
Examples:
Spending two hours daily scrolling social media, and then not having time to meet up with a friend for a coffee on the weekend
Doing the washing, ironing, cleaning and cooking for adult children still living at home
Not being present with my family in the evening because we are all attached to our phones
Now for each of the lists you’ve written above, circle the activity that’s having the greatest negative impact on that area of your life.
Write your streamlined list below with the word ‘not’ in front of each activity. Then next to each activity write down what you will do instead.
Note: You may not have a ‘not-to-do’ under all the headings above, and that’s fine.
For Example:
Work-life Productivity
Not feel compelled to answer emails/messages immediately
I will check my emails/messages between 11 am and 12 pm and then again between 4 pm and 5 pm. I’ll answer them in order of priority in that time frame.
Health Habits
Not eat takeaway food every night
I’ll write a healthy eating plan for the week and stock up on the necessary items on the weekend
Money Habits
Not pay for subscriptions I never use
I will audit my subscription use at the end of each month and cancel any I’m not using regularly.
Social/Relationship Habits
Not aimlessly scroll social media daily
I’ll check my social media for half-an-hour three times a week, and use the freed-up time to schedule face-to-face get-togethers with my friends instead.
To stop doing the things on your ‘Not-To-Do’ list and to do the positive activities you want to do instead, we recommend that you write out the list above (both the negative activity and the positive one you are replacing it with) every day at the bottom of your daily ‘To-Do-List’ (if you write one), or else in your diary or journal.
Writing down your ‘Not-To-Do’ list for at least seven days will be much more effective than simply writing it once and sticking it on your fridge. The process of handwriting helps to cement new ideas in our brains.
Try out your ‘Not-To-Do’ list. We’re sure you’ll feel less stressed and more in command of your life!
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FEEL GOOD AFFIRMATIONS
I have the power to select what to focus on
I only do the activities that create the life I want to live
I take breaks and rest when needed
I am firm with my boundaries – both for myself and others
(Say or write out these affirmations slowly ten times)
KELLY’S SILLY BIT
SPORT?
I confess sport is not my forte, but had I been to any of these early 20th-century Olympic games, it may have been a different story.
Tug-of-War
From 1900 to 1920, you could have watched eight burly men (I bet they were all burly) trying to pull their opponents six feet forward to win. The English were strong in this event (I suspect it had to do with their teams being made up of a contingent of the London City Police).
Horse Long Jump
Yep. This is exactly what you're thinking. In Paris in 1900 horses had a go at showing us just how far they could leap. Sounds cool! (It wasn't very cool) The winner of the event (pictured above) jumped 6.10 metres. Not so flash, given that the long jump gold medalist that year, Alvin Kraenzlein (human), jumped 7.185 metres, though he didn’t have a horse strapped to HIS back so …
Plunge for Distance
If you've ever been a child and played in a pool, you might have played this ... sport? It's when you dive into the water and see how far you can get without moving your arms or legs. You sort of just drift underwater for 60 seconds. Referees would measure the distance floated. Only Americans competed in this event in the 1904 Olympic Games (its only year in the games).
Art
From the Stockholm 1912 games to the London 1948 Olympics, you could’ve got a medal for art inspired by sport! It was divided into five categories, and had to be original (not published before the competition):
Architecture
Literature
Music
Painting
Sculpture
Sadly, it was abandoned in 1954 as artists were considered professionals, and Olympic athletes had to be amateurs.
There have been whispers in the past to include dancing, film, photography or theatre, but this has not happened to date. Yet, breakdancing appeared last year so you never know. *Does a Raygun kangaroo bounce and leg flicky thing*
An honourable mention has to go to Solo Synchronised Swimming, which I didn’t include in the list above because, how do you judge that?
Please enjoy my favourite, Jason Sudeikis, in this Foo Fighters clip.
Start from 2 min 55 seconds in if you want to get straight into the sick synchro/ music.
Oh, and if you have a funny tummy. Skip the ending. Think Caddyshack pool scene x 1000. IYKYK.
Be an intentionalist.
Belinda & Kelly XX
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