How to successfully reinvent yourself
Four steps to a new life
Happy Friday, Intentionalists!
Throughout our lives, we’re constantly evolving. It might happen when we transition from university to the workforce and receive various promotions as we climb the corporate ladder, or when we become parents and grandparents.
But every so often, a more deliberate reinvention will be required of us. This usually happens when:
A long-held desire grows in power, and we know that we must change the current trajectory of our lives. It might be when the pain of a soulless career launches the rocket of desire to start our own company or to exchange the rat race for a quiet life in the country.
When an aspect of our personality causes us so much pain, we know that we must finally do something about it. For example, our lack of confidence sees us looked over yet again for a promotion, or our inability to manage our anger destroys another relationship.
When a shock propels us in a completely different direction. For instance, our long-term partner asks for a divorce or an industry we have thrived in for decades suddenly goes extinct.
Or sometimes it’s a partial reinvention that is required. We might really be enjoying our lives, but a dire health diagnosis means we must go from a party-animal to someone who exercises regularly, eats their vegetables and gives up smoking.
In today’s newsletter, we are going to give you four strategies and some prompt points to help you execute a successful reinvention.
So, grab your journal and a pen, and let’s get started!
STRATEGIES AND PROMPTS
1. Don’t reject your past self
Motivational speaker and writer, Mel Robbins, makes an excellent point when she says that none of us is ever starting completely from scratch when we decide to reinvent ourselves.
Sometimes, when we contemplate a transformation, we can look at our former self with loathing. We might blame our past selves for studying the ‘wrong’ subject at university or for staying too long in a loveless marriage. It’s important to remember that we were doing the best that we knew at the time, and that our past self gained a lot of life experience, which we can now use to inform the new era of our lives. And it is our past self who has safely brought us to this point where we can contemplate a new way of living.
Prompts:
Write down what it is you now long to do (or must do) with your life.
Then write down at least five important lessons or skills you can use from your past experiences to create your new life.
2. Expect a little (or a lot) of chaos
Have you noticed how easy it is for people in the movies to completely change their lives? A woman moves from a stressful corporate job to opening her own bakery in a montage sequence of less than 60 seconds. Or a man goes from a flabby TV junkie to a buff muscle machine in the same amount of screen time?
When you are reinventing your life, it’s important to anticipate that ups and downs and backwards steps will be part of the process. Leaving a marriage, even a very unhappy one, is not easy and may involve a period of mourning. Likewise, exchanging a steady paycheck for opening your own art gallery may give you some sleepless nights until you make your first significant sale.
The other issue you might face is doubting your ability to pull off your desired reinvention. As soon as you step out of your comfort zone, your brain may go into overdrive, sending you messages to make you doubt your competency or even worthiness to do such a daring thing as change.
It’s good to be aware that doing something differently or leaving a former life behind will create some chaos. This way, when the fears arise, you will be able to talk yourself through them. Confidence also comes with action. The more steps you complete towards your goal, the more confidence you will gain.
Prompt:
What are some of the difficulties or mental blocks you anticipate may happen as you embark on your reinvention? What are some possible steps you could take to overcome them?
3. Assemble your reinvention team
One of my dance teachers tells a wonderful story. She originally completed a science degree, but when she found herself working in a lab, she discovered she hated the work. Her mother took an interesting approach to help her. She assembled a group of her friends to sit around the living room and brainstorm what my teacher might like to do instead, given her talents and personality. They came up with the suggestion that she open a dance school. My teacher has never looked back. She has been very successful for over a decade now, and her welcoming and fun classes have brought joy to thousands of students.
You don’t have to undertake your reinvention alone. Your reinvention team might include supportive friends and family, an accountant or financial advisor, a mentor or a life coach.
Or you might find your team in books, support groups or online courses. It’s a great idea to read the biographies of people who reinvented themselves for inspiration.
Prompt: Who is going to be on your reinvention team?
4. Give yourself grace in how long your reinvention might take
Don’t we just love those makeover shows on television! A team rushes in and completely redoes a garden in two hours while the family is out getting a pizza. Or a person who only ever wears sweatpants and a scrunchie is transformed by hair and make-up artists into a creature worthy of strutting down a fashion runway.
I have a friend who works in television, and she tells me that after a few months, those made-over gardens start to look like vacant lots. In the same way, lottery winners often end up broke and in debt only two years after their life-changing windfall. Reinvention will fail if we don’t put the work into growing into our new identities.
And that growth may take time. It takes time – and often a lot of rejections - to become a published novelist or to create a successful business. It takes consistent effort and pushing through mental resistance to get up early to exercise to create a healthy body.
However, our chances of success are greater when we view our reinvention as an adventure rather than a destination.
Say you are driving from Sydney to Cairns in Australia. Your ultimate destination might be a resort with white sands and palm trees, but that is 2,500 km away. If you only think about reaching your destination, you might miss all the treasures along the way – rainforests, mountains, idyllic beach coves, wildlife crossings, and quaint seaside towns. On the downside, you might also hit some bumps along the way – wrong turns, towns where everything closes by 6 pm, so you spend the night hungry, or a burst tyre. But if you undertake the road trip in the right spirit, all of these become part of your adventure.
As journal enthusiasts, we encourage you to document each step in your reinvention, the same way the explorers of times past kept a logbook. Record your achievements, your setbacks, the interesting people you are meeting on your journey, etc. If it takes you 12 months or five years to reach your reinvention destination, you won’t feel cheated. You will have had a wonderful, fully-lived adventure. And you will be amazed at how much you’ve grown into your new life.
⚘ Spread the good vibes ⚘
If you enjoyed today’s newsletter, we’d love it if you could give us a heart.
If you think a friend could do with its uplifting message, feel free to use the button below to share it with them. Let’s make life good together 💌
FEEL GOOD AFFIRMATIONS
I go for my dreams with my whole heart
I have the power to transform my life
Reinvention is a journey, and I enjoy every stop along the way
(Pick an affirmation and say or write it slowly ten times. And if you want to repeat all the affirmations, that’s wonderful too!)
✧ If you’d like more tips to be intentional and feel great, be sure to follow us on Instagram and Facebook ✧
KELLY’S SILLY BIT
Ahoy! I’m back. Thank you, beautiful Belinda, for being the best and taking over last week. I adored your joyful images!
Last Tuesday, my appendix decided to be a real appendick and I had to go to the hospital and have it taken out urgently. The same day, I underwent a CT scan. Wild.
And I couldn't laugh! It was hell for me. I had to tell some of my mates I love them, but please, if they could call me again later. You know the mates who just set you off giggling?
Anyway, it was a quick visit, and I’m home now. Side note: How beautiful are nurses? And the warm blankets they give you (extreme Homer Simpson voice: mmm warm blankets). I thought I would share some cool appendix facts!
First of all, what is an appendix?
It’s a small pouch that’s about the size of your pinky finger. Tiny if you have child hands like mine. No one really knows what its function is. Truly! Is it a digestive organ? Does it have a role in our immune system? Some scientists think that in time our appendix will eventually disappear altogether from our bodies!
What I do know is, if it gets a bit angry, best take that sucker out.
The FIRST vision of the organ we have is thanks to Leonardo da Vinci
This drawing is from 1492. It’s said that he dissected 30 human corpses to get a better understanding of how we work.
Da Vinci also takes your appendix out
The surgical robot used to remove your appendix laparoscopically is called the Da Vinci! The most commonly used robotic system for laparoscopic appendectomies is called the Da Vinci system. CUTE!
A Russian surgeon removed his own in 1961
Leonid Ivanovich Rogozov was the only medical professional on an Antarctic expedition. He tried for two days with antibiotics, but it wasn’t working. So he did his own appendicectomy under a local anaesthesia using three regular people (not trained medicals) and a mirror. I feel sick at the thought of this.It’s the worm of the bowel
That’s what ancient Egyptians thought anyway. They encountered them when preparing bodies for funerary rites, and I guess it must have looked veniform, which is the Latin term for worm-like, that still pops up in medical texts today.Pump up your guts
If you have keyhole surgery, as I did, the surgeon makes a small cut below your belly button, which they use to pump carbon dioxide gas into your tummy to create the space needed for the operation. They use a camera with a light on the end, pop that in your guts to allow the surgeon to see inside. There are two more cuts made on your abdomen through which are inserted special instruments that are needed to remove your appendix.
This is cool, except I thought I slept weird after the operation. It turns out that the shoulder pain was from the gas used to inflate my stomach like a balloon.6 out of 100 people
My surgeon said that around 6 out of 100 people will suffer from appendicitis in their lifetime. If that’s you one day, don’t be scared. Please feel free to ask me any questions if you need at any time 💗Appendicitis nearly rumbled the King’s coronation
The great-great-grandfather of King Charles fell ill about two weeks before showtime, and he wasn’t keen on having an appendectomy (a pretty new procedure in 1902). Mortality rates then were 26% (Insert Lucille Ball EUGGHHHH noise here). When it was made clear he would most likely die without it, he gave in. King Edward VII recovered, got his pomp and ceremony on and was crowned on August 9, 1902.
I hope you liked my facts! If you have more, you know we love to hear them!
I have to apologise. I won’t be able to get out and about with Mikey again for a few weeks (He. Is. FUMING.) but I did record some bits the day of and just before I went for my CT scan. I’ve not watched them yet, BUT if they are okay to work with, I’ll create something for you soon.
In the meantime, please enjoy my first attempt from a few weeks ago. Until I get out and film a new one, I’ll post some of the older ones. Thank you for understanding
😄👉👈:
Be an intentionalist.
Belinda & Kelly XX
PS: Please tap the heart button on this post if you enjoyed it, or share it with a friend! It helps people discover it on Substack. Let us know what you think in the comments!
✧ Read our previous newsletters ✧